I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
The police scanner is talking about you again....
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
