So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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