You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
