Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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