White coat. Heels.
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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