u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Randomize
