I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Randomize
