i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
