Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
