A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
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