I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
