Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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