chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Randomize
