i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
