I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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