He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Randomize
