shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
