David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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