i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
