Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
