I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
