I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
