oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
