yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
