she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
where are you?
Hypothermia
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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