She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
