I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
