i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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