Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
