i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
