It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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