My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
