Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Randomize