Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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