Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Randomize
