I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Terrible idea I love it
Randomize
