You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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