You're my little dorito
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Just puked most of my soul out..
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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