What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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