making cat noises will not fix the situation.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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