She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
