question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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