I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
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We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
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i need some magic done to my vagina
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize