also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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