i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Im part way to drunk.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
