Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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