Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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