Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Randomize
