i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Houston, we have a blender
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
