that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize